Just The Facts, Folks

by Courtney Sirotin on June 8, 2012

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Its been a weird week and I haven’t been able to post as much as usual so I wanted to take a minute to touch base on a few things that have been on my mind.

1) Looking for a place to live this week has been full of emotional highs and lows and they’re not over yet. First we found a place that was in a great location but needed new carpets and a full paint job. The neighborhood was pretty good (had a pool) but there was no grass anywhere in the neighborhood where Dylan could play. Things turned around a few days ago when, after seeing a dud house that was too far away, we drove through a neighborhood to preview a house we were scheduled to see the next day. The neighborhood blew us away (gorgeous pool, fitness center, tennis courts, club house, playground, soccer fields!), the rent was perfect and the townhouses, from what we could see, were big and pretty. We told the realtor we wanted the place – sight unseen. We were flying high for 24 hours…until Jay had a chance to view the place and said it was disgusting inside. We are trying to find out if the landlord will fix it up to our standards because we love the neighborhood so much, but its all still up in the air and time is ticking!

2) I took Dylan to a bounce house/indoor playground yesterday and this little four year old girl was obsessed with us. She was demanding my attention and probably said, “Watch me! Watch me!” a thousand times. Her mother was nearby reading a book and studiously ignoring her child so I was happy to pay her some attention because it wasn’t a big deal and Dylan was finding her fascinating. He clapped in delight each time she did a trick, which was constantly. Anyway, it all turned sour when she stopped jumping and said to me, “You look like you have a baby in your belly.” Shocked, I said, “Well, I do not.” To which she noted, while pointing to my lower abdomen, “Well, it looks like you do.” Grrr. I snuck around the corner of the bouncy thing she and Dylan were jumping on and called Jay to tell him what she had said. I speculated that maybe it was just the shirt I was wearing, which I then noticed clung to my stomach and showed its outline too well. Jay wanted a picture so I snapped two. In one I look fine but in the other I can see the pooch.

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Anyway, this brings me to the third thing:

3) Dylan had Kindermusick scheduled for after the bounce house so I sucked in my stomach and got him in the car. I noticed his diaper was full so I decided to change him in the car before we left. I keep pull-up diapers on hand for when we are out of the house because they allow me to change him standing up instead of having to get him on his back and wrestle him to keep still. As I usually do, I took off his wet diaper and propped him on my knee while I got the pull-up diaper over his feet. That’s when I noticed the poop. There was a poop in the diaper which meant there was currently poop on my leg! I instinctively put Dylan down to observe the damage to my pants and he took advantage of the moment to bolt into the front seat with poop smeared on his butt. I had to grab my wipes and lunge for his bottom before he could sit and contaminate the front. I let him get into things in the front while I got the worst of the poop off my pants. When my pants were manageable (but still gross!) I got a diaper on Dylan and forced him into his car seat. He was beside himself at this point he had tasted freedom and then I took it away.

Once Dylan was secured I got out some hand sanitizer (because it was the best available option) and set about sanitizing my pants. Snapped this one just for you guys!

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(You’re welcome.)

At this point we were running late for Kindermusik, otherwise I would’ve gone home to change. Heaven knows I wasn’t pleased with my shirt either.

So we get to Kindermusik and I’m pretty sure I’m wafting an odor of poop but that’s not nearly as unnerving as the two mothers who were whispering with each other and not doing a good job of disguising the fact that they were looking at my stomach. I am not lying when I say I heard one of them said, “I think she is.” Yep, they were trying to figure out if I was pregnant! I wanted to scream, “I’m not pregnant, people! I’m bloated and covered in poop but I am not pregnant!” Anyway, I’m never wearing that outfit again. Also, why do I keep getting poop on my pants!?

Well….I guess that’s enough of an update for today. See you on Sunday for the Weekend Recap!

p.s. The picture at the top of the page is strictly for your enjoyment.

{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

DONNA CUSHING June 9, 2012 at 12:51 pm

All i know is that girl is going to have a long hard road ahead of her if she continues to give that comment. It applies to just about every woman. And none of them are going to appreciate it. Just the fact that her mom was ignoring her speaks volumes!

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COURTNEY June 12, 2012 at 3:03 am

I sincerely THANK YOU for the validation, Mother.

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